Mizz Dita Von Teese

Dita Von Teese (the former Mrs. Marilyn Manson) is a new It Girl. She's in cahoots with Perez Hilton, who shamelessly plugs her every move at least weekly. He's so catty and rips apart almost everyone, save a Favored Few such as her.

She is a "burlesque dancer." I didn't even know what that was or that burlesque dancers still existed. Isn't that some shady gig that ended in the 1940s? I'm picturing moonshine at a speakeasy during Prohibition with busty ladies entertaining the gentlemen. At some point (earlier this year from what I've observed), she became a legitimate performer and not a a stripper claiming to be an artiste. Now she's getting booked to perform at tons of corporate parties where celebrities go. Apparently her shows include her wearing pasties and swinging almost naked from 50 feet in the air and dancing suggestively with a custom-made giant lipstick. She's a fixture on the red carpet (any red carpet) and is photographed going "out for drinks" at the Chateau Marmont.

Despite being quite hetero, she definitely is hot enough to make me dream of another woman. She's also really made me re-consider what is art and what is acceptable entertainment. I like that.

I wish I could be her when I grow up. She makes no excuses or apologies. She knows she's hot, she knows we want to see her bump and grind, and she is surely paid handsomely for it.

She is in her mid-30s and the fact that she is close in age to me and looks THAT damn good gives me a smidge of hope for my physical future. Maybe I need to invest in some overpriced MAC cosmetics at Sephora.